Hank has no butt and a narrow urethra. Dale is consumed with conspiracy theories and is oblivious to his wife's long-standing affair with John Redcorn. Boomhauer is incredibly vain and frequently unaware that he is past his prime. And yet, somehow, Bill Dauterive is still the loser of Rainey Street. Here are seven of Bill's best moments. Sorry, Bill. Giving you ten just didn't seem right in the scheme of things.

• 7.

  I'm Lenore

  Oh, Lenore. White gloves while drinking beer? From the can? Total fashion faux pas.
• 6.

  Lonely Man Dinner

  The only thing that makes this sadder is the realization that Bill is standing in broken plate pieces as he's eating/chugging his meal.
• 5.

  BIG FAT PANTLOAD

  It's a long road from High School Football Player to Big Fat Pantload. And that road is paved with a lot of beer. A massive, insane amount of beer.
• 4.

  THE GENTLE WIND

  Who hasn't dreamed of making out with a woman while their dead husband's ghost wind blows all around you?
• 3.

  I'LL HELP YOU, MA'AM

  Bill's plan is a little pathetic, but on the other hand, he doesn't own his own tanning bed.
• 2.

  HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE GAY

  Is wearing a backpack a gay stereotype? Because that is the one element of Bill's costume we’re just not getting.
• 1.

  KAHN'S MOM

  Nice job on the neckerchief, Bill. It's a very discrete match with your ratty, old undershirt.